Stuck in the middle with a bunch of decisions and there are no definite answers of what the right thing to do is. Sober and working life is complicated and the longer I spend clean and sober, the more I despise the world for issues that significantly impact the entire world much more than my personal struggle with addiction. I’ve started at a new job with an incredible atmosphere that I feel honestly reflects and strengthens the positive aspects of my personality. However, I can’t help but second guess what I’m doing. The power that comes with the manipulation you are taught, which makes people do what you want, can prove to you the world likely revolves around individuals needs and the way they achieve them. In the bigger picture I see what we’re doing by how the hospitals are allocating significant money by paying us to fundraise for causes, that in fact if they just put the money directly into the hospitals, there would be less running around in circles simply solved by directly funding the necessities of life, such as public health care. Then taking into consideration the government, which everyday I’m proven is more and more corrupt in senses that they cut the funding of necessities, for the politicians to add a few zeros to the end of their salaries, when people are suffering and dying, and I feel so stupid saying this because it’s so obvious to me and I’ve got to be one of the most ignorant people on these issues, so I’m sure everyone knows it, but why does everyone turn a blind eye to it? And saying this as I am the absolute least depressed state i’ve been in, in over 6 years why is no one doing anything? How come a bunch of idiots are manipulating the world? Well I think it’s because everyones out for themselves, everyone’s manipulating someone or something to achieve what that need despite what the rest of society needs. I feel like there are elements in our society for example women’s rights that make us seem like we have progressed so much, but then we are being lied to and our taxes aren’t funding necessities but instead are funding junkie’s habits. I could go on for days of all our faults in this world, but i’ve learnt to love life. My attitude is different now and I feel so much better because of it, but the more I think, the more I wish to be ignorant.